Leaving Behind

There's been alot of communication today about us leaving CR -- notes from our pastors, plans to debrief. In the midst of changing, our work goes on. (We still have to be ready for Monday.) Tonight I read a testimony to be delivered this week, and I realized just how sad it was to go.

The testimony comes from a man that to look at him, you'd never guess there was an issue ever in his life. Tall and handsome, he was always well-dressed in clothes that cost way more than James' car. He was a success in his line of work, and someone who generally commanded respect. I remember when he first came to group. He was so sour. He came in late and always left early. He seemed to think everyone else was wrong. To keep his marriage intact, he agreed to the step study, and over the course of the year, he's become completely new. Now he comes because his life has been changed, and you can see it even on his face. He's in the door early, and some nights we nearly have to push him back out the door.

Today, when I was thinking of those we were leaving, his face is one of the first that came to my mind. It's so strange how these people have caputured my heart in such an unusual way. I feel so protective that to think of handing them off to anyone else makes me feel so, so afraid. It's the same kind of concern I felt when considering leaving my kids with sitters -- which I've not yet done.

I know our season has come to an end. I'm excited about what God has in store for us and for the leaders who will serve in our stead. But even at that, it's so sad to leave the loved and familiar.